How to Write a Eulogy for a Best Friend

Writing a eulogy for your best friend may feel like one of the hardest things you’ll ever face. They may have been your confidant, your partner in laughter, or the one who stood by you through life’s highs and lows. Whatever the bond, the challenge is the same: you’re trying to capture their place in your heart and your story — all within just a few minutes of spoken words.

That can feel impossible — and in some ways, it is. No single speech can reflect everything your best friend was or everything they meant. But it can capture something true, and that glimpse can bring comfort to those listening.

Background with flowers, notebook, coffee cup, and a hand writing with pen, overlaid with the title “Honouring Your Best Friend in Words”.

This is why a eulogy matters. It gives voice to your grief, but it also celebrates your best friend’s life. It helps those who listen connect to their own memories of them, and it leaves you with the reassurance that you’ve honoured them in the best way you can.

Writing for a best friend is often uniquely meaningful. They may have been the one who shared your secrets, stood beside you through life’s challenges, or filled your days with laughter and companionship. A best friend is not chosen by chance but by connection — and that bond makes the task of speaking at their farewell both tender and profound.

To stand and speak at their farewell can feel like both an honour and a responsibility — a way of expressing gratitude, sharing your story together, and reflecting the impact they had on you and everyone who knew them. That makes the task deeply significant.

It’s important to remember there is no “perfect” eulogy. It doesn’t need to be polished or poetic. It just needs to be sincere.

Whether your best friend’s death was sudden or expected, whether you are speaking in a church, a crematorium, or at a celebration of life gathering, your words will matter most because they come from you.

In this guide, we’ll explore what a eulogy for a best friend means, outline structures you can follow, provide reflection prompts, share a full example speech, and offer gentle advice for writing and delivering with confidence.

What a Eulogy for a Best Friend Means

A eulogy for a best friend is not just a recounting of their life events. It’s an expression of love, gratitude, and remembrance. A best friend often holds a uniquely special role: they may have been the one who shared your secrets, supported you through challenges, or brought laughter and light into your everyday life.

When we speak of them at a funeral, we are often speaking not only about what they did, but about who they were — the qualities that defined them and the ways they touched the lives around them.

A eulogy for a best friend often weaves together three strands:

Love and Gratitude — the affection, loyalty, and companionship that made your friendship so deeply cherished.

Stories and Memories — the experiences that capture their character: their humour, their kindness, the adventures you shared, or the small moments that made your bond unique.

Legacy — how their presence continues to shape you, your circle of friends, and everyone who loved them.

Even the words we choose carry meaning. “Best friend” may feel universal, while a nickname, inside joke, or term of endearment often reflects the true closeness of your bond. Whichever you use, the significance lies in your relationship with them.

And remember: your best friend’s story doesn’t have to be told in a grand way. Sometimes it’s the smallest moments — the sound of their laugh, the way they stood by your side, or a tradition you shared — that capture them more vividly than any milestone.

Types of Eulogies for a Best Friend

There’s no single “right” way to write a eulogy. Some people naturally tell a life story in order, while others prefer to highlight qualities, values, or defining memories. Knowing the different styles can ease the pressure, because it reminds you that you can choose the shape that feels most natural to you — and to your best friend’s story.

Below are three common approaches. You don’t have to follow them exactly, but they can give you a helpful starting point as you think about how to organise your words.

Chronological

This approach tells their life story in order: childhood, school years, passions or career, how your friendship began, and the role they played in later years.

Example opening: “My best friend was born in 1988 in Leeds. From their earliest days, their energy and humour shone through — qualities that shaped our friendship and touched everyone they met.”

Thematic

This focuses on qualities or themes such as loyalty, kindness, humour, resilience, or adventure.

Example opening: “If I had to choose one word to describe my best friend, it would be loyalty. They stood by me through every stage of life, offering encouragement, laughter, and unwavering support.”

Hybrid

This blends both: a brief timeline followed by themed stories that highlight their character.

Example opening: “My best friend’s story began in Bristol, but what truly defined them was their adventurous spirit and their kindness — qualities that lit up every chapter of their life.”

Most people find the hybrid approach easiest, as it balances structure with flexibility. Whichever style you choose, remember that what matters most is authenticity. Even a simple framework can carry deep meaning when the words come from the heart.


Structure of a Eulogy (Framework You Can Follow)

One of the biggest hurdles in writing a eulogy is simply knowing where to start. Having a clear structure can ease the pressure and give you a roadmap to follow. You don’t have to stick to it rigidly — the most meaningful tributes are those that feel natural — but these five parts can help you turn scattered memories into a flowing, heartfelt speech.

Opening Words

Begin by welcoming everyone and acknowledging why you’re gathered. A simple thank-you creates connection straight away.

Example: “Thank you for being here today to celebrate the life of my best friend, Lucy.”

Life Overview

Offer a short sketch of your best friend’s journey — where they grew up, family life, their career, passions, or key milestones. Keep it brief; the aim is to provide context, not a full biography.

Stories and Anecdotes

Choose two or three moments that capture who they were. These might be funny, touching, or everyday stories that reveal their character. Anecdotes are often what people remember most.

Qualities and Values

Highlight the traits that defined them: loving, devoted, humorous, resilient, or generous. Linking these qualities back to your stories make the tribute feel cohesive.

Closing Words

End with a final farewell, a blessing, or a comforting thought. This is your chance to leave listeners with a lasting impression of their spirit.

Example: “Lucy, your love and light will stay with me always, carried in our memories and in the family we built together.”

Wooden block with a question mark symbol, representing reflection prompts for writing a eulogy for a best friend

Reflection Prompts

Facing a blank page can be daunting. Sometimes the hardest part of writing a eulogy is knowing where to begin. Reflection prompts are gentle questions designed to spark memories and help you put scattered thoughts into words. They give you a starting point — not to limit what you say, but to open the door to stories and feelings you might otherwise overlook.

Use these prompts to get started:

  • What lessons did my best friend teach me that I still carry with me?

  • How did my best friend show love, humour, or support in everyday ways?

  • Which routines, traditions, or moments we shared remind me most of them?

  • What did my best friend value most in life?

  • If I had one more chance, what would I thank them for?

If those prompts feel helpful but you’re still struggling to put pen to paper, another way to spark ideas is through objects connected to your best friend. Physical reminders — like a gift they gave you, a playlist you both loved, a ticket stub from an adventure you shared, or even a note or card they once wrote — often unlock memories and emotions that questions alone can’t reach.





Hands holding old letters and photos as part of a memory exercise for writing a eulogy for a best friend

Memory Exercise

Sometimes memories flow easily; other times they feel just out of reach. A simple exercise can help unlock them. By using objects connected to your best friend — a gift they gave you, a card they wrote, a favourite hoodie, or a photo from a trip you shared — you can trigger stories and emotions that may be exactly what you want to include in your eulogy.

Try this:

  • Gather photos, letters, or personal items connected to your best friend.

  • Choose one and write about the memory it evokes.

  • Free-write for 10 minutes without editing.

  • Highlight one or two details you could share in your eulogy.

Asking mutual friends, colleagues, or even family members for their favourite memories can also help. Even a single story from another person may spark ideas of your own and remind you of moments you want to bring into your tribute.


Example Eulogy for a Best Friend

Reading examples can often make the task feel less overwhelming. Seeing how someone else has shaped their thoughts into a speech helps you picture what your own might look like.

The following example isn’t meant to be copied word for word — instead, it shows one possible way to weave together memories, qualities, and gratitude into a flowing tribute for a best friend.

As you read, notice the structure: a short welcome, a few meaningful stories, reflections on their character, and a heartfelt closing. You can adapt this to your own best friend’s life, swapping in details and stories that feel true to you and the bond you shared.

 

Good [morning/afternoon], everyone.

Thank you for being here today as we remember and celebrate the life of my best friend, Alex. It feels almost impossible to stand here and sum up what they meant to me — because how do you capture years of laughter, loyalty, and love in just a few minutes? But I’ll try, because Alex deserves that, and more.

I first met Alex when we were teenagers. What began as casual conversations quickly grew into a friendship that shaped my life in countless ways. Alex was the kind of friend who made ordinary moments extraordinary. Whether it was sitting on a park bench talking about everything and nothing, or heading off on some half-planned adventure, they had a way of turning time together into something unforgettable.

One of my favourite memories is from a road trip we took. We got lost, of course — Alex’s sense of direction wasn’t their strongest quality — but instead of getting frustrated, they laughed until tears rolled down their face. That’s who Alex was: someone who could turn mistakes into stories, and worries into laughter. Moments like that remind me of their gift for finding light in the darkest places.

But Alex wasn’t just funny. They were deeply kind. If you needed help, they were there. If you needed encouragement, they gave it freely. They carried people through difficult times without ever making it about themselves. Their loyalty and compassion touched every person in this room, and beyond.

To me, Alex was more than a best friend. They were family — the person I could call at 2am, the one who would drop everything just to listen. They knew my flaws and loved me anyway. That kind of bond is rare, and it’s something I’ll carry forever.

What I’ll miss most isn’t just the big things — the trips, the milestones — but the little things: Alex’s smile, the jokes we never got tired of, the silence we could share comfortably without words.

Alex, thank you for teaching me loyalty, for reminding me to laugh, and for showing me what true friendship looks like. I’ll miss you every day — but I’ll also celebrate you every day. Rest easy, my friend.

 

Want to see more eulogy examples for a best friend? We’ve put together a dedicated page of eulogy examples for a best friend — offering different lengths, tones, and styles to help you find inspiration.

 

💛 Struggling to Write a Eulogy for Your Best Friend?

The above example eulogy for a best friend is around 370 words (2–2.5 minutes). A full eulogy is usually 800–1,200 words (6–8 minutes), giving you more space to share stories and memories.

If you’re unsure how to start, or stuck partway through, we can help. We’ll shape a thoughtful first draft from your memories — or give kind, constructive feedback on what you’ve already written.

👉 Learn How We Can Support You

 

Common Challenges and How to Overcome Them

Even with the best intentions, many people find writing a eulogy harder than expected. Grief makes it difficult to think clearly, and the pressure of “getting it right” can feel overwhelming. The good news is that almost everyone faces similar hurdles, and there are gentle ways to move past them.

Here are some of the most common challenges — and simple approaches to help you through:

Too emotional to write

Grief makes it hard to focus, let alone write. If tears stop you before you start, try jotting down short notes or bullet points instead of full sentences. You can also record yourself speaking into your phone — sometimes words flow more naturally when spoken than when written. Later, you can shape these fragments into a draft.

Worried about leaving something out

Every life is bigger than any single speech, and no eulogy can capture it all. The aim isn’t to say everything, but to say something meaningful. Choose a few stories or qualities that represent your best friend, best. Listeners will fill in the gaps with their own memories, and that’s part of what makes a eulogy so powerful.

Unsure how long it should be

Most eulogies last around 6–8 minutes (roughly 800–1,200 words), which feels comfortable for most services. But some families prefer a more detailed tribute lasting 10–20 minutes (around 1,500–2,500 words), especially at celebrations of life or memorial gatherings. The right length depends on the setting and what you feel needs to be said.

Family disagreements

Sometimes siblings, in-laws, or relatives have different ideas about what should be included. Tensions can rise if everyone wants their perspective represented. A helpful approach is to agree on a few shared themes early — love, humour, resilience, generosity — and let each person’s stories fit under those. This way the tribute feels balanced without becoming a debate.


Do’s and Don’ts

When you’re writing a eulogy, it can be reassuring to have some gentle guidelines. These aren’t strict rules — every tribute is unique — but they can help you focus on what really matters and avoid common pitfalls.

Do:

Keep it personal

Share your own memories and experiences rather than trying to sound like someone else. Listeners want to hear your voice.

Use small details

Everyday touches — a favourite phrase, a well-worn chair, the way they stirred their tea — often capture more than big achievements.

Practice aloud

Reading the words out loud will help you find the right rhythm and spot anything that feels awkward.

Allow yourself to pause

Emotion is natural. Taking a breath, sipping water, or simply standing in silence for a moment can be just as powerful as words.

Avoid:

⚠️ Feeling you need to be formal or eloquent

A eulogy isn’t a performance — sincerity matters more than polished language.

⚠️ Forced humour

Gentle humour can bring comfort, but only if it feels natural and true to your best friend’s personality.

⚠️ Comparing your words to others

Every tribute is different; focus on what you want to say, not how it measures up.

⚠️ Apologising for emotion — it’s natural

Tears and pauses show the depth of your love. No one will think less of you for them.

Tips for Delivering the Eulogy

Even with a carefully written speech, the thought of standing up and speaking can feel daunting. The good news is that no one expects perfection. People will be listening with compassion, not criticism. These tips can help you feel calmer and more prepared when the time comes.

Rehearse aloud

Reading silently isn’t the same as hearing your words out loud. Practising a few times will help you hear the natural rhythm, smooth out tricky phrases, and build confidence.

Print your speech clearly

Use a large font and double spacing so your eyes can follow the lines easily. It also helps if your hands tremble or your vision blurs with tears.

Mark pauses

Adding small slashes or spaces on the page reminds you to breathe and slow down. Pauses also give your listeners time to take in your words.

Pay attention to body language

Stand tall, breathe deeply, and make gentle eye contact from time to time. These simple gestures help you feel grounded and keep your audience engaged.

Ground yourself with a keepsake

Holding something that belonged to your best friend — a book, a photo, or a keepsake tied to their hobbies — can steady you and provide comfort.

If emotions rise

Don’t be afraid to stop, breathe, or sip water. A pause shows love and gives everyone a chance to share in the moment. People will understand.

Have a backup

Give a copy of your speech to someone you trust. If you feel unable to continue, they can step in, ensuring your words are still heard.


Other Styles and Examples

Every eulogy is unique, and there are many different ways people choose to honour their best friend. Some prefer a short, tender eulogy, focusing on just one or two cherished memories. Others create a longer, more detailed tribute that might last 15 minutes or more.

If you’re looking for inspiration, you might explore:

  • A sample eulogy for a best friend from childhood, reflecting on the adventures, shared secrets, and lifelong bond you built together.

  • A eulogy for a best friend remembered as family, highlighting the loyalty, love, and sense of belonging they gave.

  • A funny eulogy for a best friend, when their humour, mischief, or unforgettable stories defined them and would bring a smile to those listening.

  • A brief eulogy example for a best friend, which can be just as meaningful when time is short but heartfelt words are needed.

  • A simple template for writing a eulogy for a best friend, to provide structure if you’re unsure where to begin.

These variations all serve the same purpose: to honour your friend in a way that feels true. Whether you write something short and simple or a longer, more detailed speech, what matters most is that your words come from the heart.

Frequently Asked Questions

  • Most eulogies last around 6–8 minutes when spoken, usually 800–1,200 words. This length feels comfortable for many funeral services. However, some families prefer a more detailed tribute that runs 10–20 minutes (around 1,500–2,500 words), especially at celebrations of life or memorial gatherings where there is more time to share stories.

    The right length depends on the setting, the audience, and how much you feel needs to be said.

  • Yes, if it feels natural and reflects their personality. Light humour or a favourite story can often bring comfort and smiles during a difficult moment.

  • Absolutely. Sometimes several relatives choose to share short reflections, offering different perspectives on the life and personality of the person they loved. These shorter tributes can complement one another beautifully — showing how your best friend touched lives in many ways.

  • It’s okay. Ask someone else to step in, or pause and continue when ready.

  • Yes. A template can provide structure if you’re unsure where to start. You can adapt it with your own stories and details to make it personal.

  • A short eulogy often highlights one or two memories, a defining quality, and a farewell. Example:

    “My best friend, Pamela was warm and generous. She always made everyone feel welcome at her table. We’ll miss her kindness, but we’ll carry it with us.”

  • Yes — if it reflects who they were. Gentle humour, especially tied to shared family stories, can bring smiles even in grief.

 

💬 The First Words Can Be the Hardest — Let Us Help

Writing a eulogy for your best friend can feel overwhelming. That’s why we offer to write the first 150 words for free — based on your memories. It’s a gentle first step, so you don’t have to face the blank page alone.

No cost. No pressure. Just a little help when you need it most.

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Writing a eulogy for your best friend — whether you say Best Friend, Brother, Sister, Mate, or use a nickname only the two of you shared — is not about saying everything. It’s about saying something true. With even a few heartfelt words, you can honour their memory, bring comfort to others, and carry their story forward with love and dignity.

Your best friend’s influence lives on in the laughter you shared, the support they gave, and the countless moments — both big and small — that shaped your journey together. By offering even a glimpse of who they were, you help keep their spirit alive — felt in the stories retold, in the traditions you shared, and in the bond of friendship that continues even after their passing.

Rob Hitch

Traveller, writer, and project manager with experience across aviation, logistics, oil, and pharmaceuticals. Rob runs Dignity Bereavement Support and writes at RobHitch.com about purposeful living, travel, and tech.

https://www.RobHitch.com
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